


i think i like you best

by adamnparrishs



Category: IT stephen king
Genre: Boys In Love, Drug Use, I put underage just because of the drug use, Kissing, M/M, and even then it’s literally just making out, ben/bev, bill/stan - Freeform, its there you just have to squint, nothing sexual happens until they’re aged up
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-05
Updated: 2017-10-05
Packaged: 2019-01-09 09:10:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,668
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12273330
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/adamnparrishs/pseuds/adamnparrishs
Summary: or: the one where richie is in love with eddie and takes too long to figure it out





	i think i like you best

**Author's Note:**

> any mistakes are mine enjoy this clusterfuck of self indulgent topics

When Richie Tozier is fourteen, he shares his first kiss with a girl, Darcy Hallows to be exact, behind the music block at school. It’s awkward and chaste and neither of them know what they’re doing, but they do it any way. Because that’s what kids do right? 

Richie loved it. Darcy did not. Richie wanted to do it again. Darcy did not. Instead, she shuffled her feet awkwardly, checked her watch and made an excuse that she was late for her flute lesson before sauntering off in a bored manner. 

Richie’s heart was rattling in his rib cage. 

He would later go on to tell the losers of this kiss of his, bragging that he was the first out of all of them to get this far. 

Bill had rolled his eyes. “A-a-actually, B-bev and I kissed w-way before yo-ou and Darcy.”

“But Bill, my man,” Richie said, slinging an arm over Eddie’s shoulder. He ruffled the smaller boy’s hair. “Have you progressed to third base? Because I sure did. In fact, she was so good she even tops your moth-“

“Beep beep, Richie.” Eddie said, picking at a thread on his shorts. 

Richie ruffled his hair again, grinning like a madman. “Jealous, Eds?” 

Eddie huffed and squirmed out of Richie’s grasp. The tip of his ears were the colour of beetroot. “In your dreams. I just don’t want to hear about your sexual adventures with the goth.”

Eddie knew right after he said it that he’d walked straight into a pothole with no way out, but he still had hope that Richie wouldn’t say it. 

Though, Richie, with a smile as large as any Eddie had seen, leaned back and said, “I could tell you, in detail, about the sexual adventures i’ve had with your mother.”

“Shut the fuck up, Trashmouth.”

•

When Richie is sixteen, the losers are sitting in a circle in Bill’s garage. A joint is being passed around the circle. 

“We should,” Stan said, trailing off mid sentence as something else absorbs his attention before zoning back in. “We should play a game or something?”

Richie snorts. “What are you? Twelve?”

Stan looks away sadly and Bill punches Richie in the ribs, causing him to choke on his inhale. 

“Don’t be such a d-dick, R-Ri-Richie,” Bill said, taking the joint out of Richie’s hand. He turned to Stan. “How about Tr-truth or dare?”

“I’ll go first!” Ben yells, probably louder than he initially wanted to. “Bev, truth or dare?”

Bev, who was laying on her back looking up at the ceiling, raised her eyebrow. “Dare.”

Ben thought for a moment before clapping his hands in glee. “I got one! I dare you to kiss the person you want to most out of all of us.”

Mike erupted into giggles and passed the joint to Eddie who shook his head and passed it to Bev. 

Bev took a long drag, closed her eyes, then got up and moved towards Ben. Ben’s face froze as Beverly’s hands cupped it, and before he knew it she was leaning in. 

“Keep it PG,” Richie laughed, covering Eddie’s eyes. “There’s kids about.”

“Fuck you, Tozier.” 

“Yes, Eds, talk dirty to me.”

“Now that that has been cleared up,” Bev said, now sitting next to Ben. “Richie, truth or dare?”

“Truth. I’m too fucked to move,” Richie leaned his head on Eddie’s shoulder. He noted how comfortable and warm it was. 

Bev blinked slowly, swamped for a second, before smiling. “How many people have you kissed?”

Richie smirked. “Five and a quarter.”

Eddie frowned. “That doesn’t make fucking sense.”

“Sure it does,” Richie said, bringing his hand up to his face to count. “Darcy Hallows. One. Willow Page. Two. Nancy Everest. Three. Ben Jones. Four. Your mother. Five and a quarter.”

Richie waited for the eruption of laughter or the shove from Eddie that he normally got when he made mom jokes, but instead all he got was shocked looks from his six best friends. 

“What?” He was genuinely confused. “Have a got something on my face?”

Stan was the first to speak. “You kissed Ben Jones?”

Richie’s smile faltered. “Yes, I did. In the empty gym after class. We were alone and I was talking about how Chemistry sucked ass and he-“

“I didn’t know you were gay,” Eddie’s voice sounded strained, a little breathless, as if he’d just pelted it up two flights of stairs. 

Richie’s eyebrows shot up to his hairline. “What?! I’m not gay.”

“But you’ve kissed a boy,” Mike said. 

Beverly nudged him. “But he’s also kissed girls.”

“He’s never committed to a girl though,” Bill said, and Stan added, “He’s also never committed to a boy.”

“Guys!” Richie felt his heart in his throat. “I’m not gay!”

Eddie stiffened underneath him. “What’s wrong with being gay?”

“Nothing!” Richie said, exasperated. “Stan’s gay for god sake. So is Bill. Nothing is wrong with being gay, I’m just not gay.”

Ben smiled softly at him. “It’s okay if you are. We would never judge you.”

A long groan escaped Richie’s lips. “I’m. Not. Gay.”

“But you kissed a boy!” Mike said. 

“And I also kissed a girl!” Richie was beginning to get frustrated and upset. “Why can’t I just like both?”

The silence following Richie question was deafening, and Richie wanted nothing more than to curl up into a ball and die. 

Bill was the first to break the silence. “Oh,” he said. “I guess you can like both. Mike, truth or dare?”

And everyone went back to normal. Except, Richie’s heart was still pounding and he didn’t realise that Eddie’s was too. 

•

When Richie was seventeen, he found himself in a superstore at midnight with the losers who were looking for snacks for their movie marathon day. 

He was sat in a shopping cart that Eddie had decided to push around, pulling random things off the shelves and into the cart. 

Richie scoffed. "Why the fuck does this have a nut allergy warning on it?"

Eddie shrugged, chucking a packet of breadsticks into their basket. "To warn people with nut allergies?"

"This is a literal bag of nuts. Why would someone pick this up and think 'hm, better check if there's a nut allergy warning.' It makes no fucking sense."

“Jesus, I don’t know. Ask the manufacturer,” Eddie said, rolling his eyes. 

“Too much effort,” Richie sighed, throwing the nuts back on the shelf. “The only effort I insist putting in is when I do your mother- FUCK.”

The shopping cart swivelled to the side, making an ear piercing screeching noise. Richie leaned left, trying to stop it from toppling over but soon enough, with a painful and loud crash, him, the cart, all the food and Eddie were crumpled on the floor in one big heap. 

“Jesus, fuck,” Eddie gripped his wrist, a packet of crisps falling off his head. “That fucking hurt. Fuck me.”

Richie smirked at Eddie, who was currently laying on top of him with the shopping cart sitting over them like a cage. “If you’re gonna ask stuff like that, wait until we’re in private. You okay?”

Eddie grimaced at his wrist but nodded his head. “Yeah. If it’s damaged, though, you’re explaining it to my mum.”

“I’m not the one who tried to kill you with a cart.”

“I lost control! It’s not my fault.”

“Funny. That’s exactly what your mom said to be last night when she started screaming-“

Eddie smacked his arm. “God, shut up.”

Richie, laughing loudly, noticed that Eddie hadn’t move from his position on top of him. In fact, it didn’t look like Eddie was going to make any effort to move any time soon. Richie smirked up at him. 

“Hey,” he said, pushing himself up on his elbows. 

“Hi,” Eddie said back, his voice just barely above a whisper. His eyes flickered from Richie’s eyes to his lips, his teeth bringing his own bottom lip into his mouth. 

They were so close that Richie could feel Eddie’s breath on his cheek, could feel Eddie’s heart racing in rhythm with his own. 

_If he doesn’t move soon_ , Richie thought. _I won’t be able to stop myself from kissing him._

Eddie was looking at him with fear and excitement and dread and something and Richie was looking back at him the same way and it was all too much and not enough. Then, without a word, Eddie swiftly leaned down and pressed his lips against Richie’s with a certainty that settled in both boys stomachs. 

After freezing up with the initial shock, Richie reached for Eddie’s collar and pulled him closer, kissing back immediately and sighing into the other boys mouth as he did. Richie opened his mouth a little wider and allowed Eddie to slip his tongue in, and Richie honestly thought that he was going to die from bliss. 

A gasp escaped his mouth as Eddie moved one of his hands to pull at Richie’s hair and–

“Eddie? Richie?” 

Eddie pushed himself off Richie so fast that Richie swore he was on fire. The look on Eddie’s face as he scrambled to his feet indicated that he was. 

“Jesus. Look at the shopping cart,” Stan said, picking up a chocolate bar. “What were you guys doing?”

Richie, red in the face and lost for words, stayed on the floor, looking at all of his friends in dismay. 

Eddie, clutching his wrist and looking directly at Richie with an indecipherable look, said. “Nothing.”

•

When Richie Tozier was seventeen and a half, he realised that he was in love with Eddie Kaspbrak. 

He also realised that he’d been in love with Eddie Kaspbrak for a long damn time. 10 years in fact.

Every time he kissed someone, Eddie was in the back of his mind. Every time someone talked about relationships, Eddie was in the back of his mind. Every time he was without Eddie, Eddie was in the back of his mind. 

He thought it was just the fact that Eddie was his best friend. That he couldn’t wait to tell Eddie about his first kiss and that’s why he thought of him during it. That he couldn’t wait to gossip about relationships. That he missed Eddie. 

But it took him 10 and a half years to realise it was more than that. 

Ever since his kiss with Eddie, Richie had wanted to do it again and again and again until his lips were numb and his body was undone. But, they hardly ever got time alone, and when they did Eddie would make up some bullshit excuse as to why he couldn’t stay long. 

So Richie, in his right mind, was pissed. 

“Hey, Eddie,” Bill threw a piece of popcorn in Stan’s mouth. “You s-s-sta-staying tonight?”

Eddie fidgeted with his fingers. “Sorry, but I’ve got work in the morning. I need to get home.”

“Let me walk you,” Richie said, getting on his feet. He brushed his hands off on his pants. 

“Oh. N-no, it’s fine. Honestly I can–“

Richie smiled, though it didn’t reach his eyes. “No sweat dude, I need some fresh air anyway.”

Eddie’s face was a mixture of annoyance and stress before a mask of fake happiness covered it up. If you blinked, you would’ve missed it. Richie didn’t blink. 

The cold air of the mid December night smacked at Richie’s cheeks as he strode quickly to catch up with Eddie. Eddie, on the other hand, seemed dead set on walking anywhere but next to Richie, and so every time Richie caught up with him, his pace would pick up just that little bit more. 

Richie, a little out of breath, said, “Slow down, you little shit.”

“Sorry,” Eddie shrugged, unbelievably picking up the pace more. “Have to get home.”

“Fucks sake, Eddie, wait,” Richie said, jogging up to Eddie and grabbing his wrist. Eddie stopped dead in his tracks and looked down at where Richie’s fingers encircled his wrist. His face was a mixture of indecipherable emotions and he sounded like he was going to have an asthma attack. 

He looked up at Richie. “What, Tozier?”

“Really? I’m down to Tozier?” Richie felt his heart thudding in his chest. He didn’t know whether it was because of the cold, the jog or Eddie. Probably the latter. “I don’t even get the novelty of Trashmouth or even, I don’t know, my name?” 

Eddie looked back down and shuffled on his feet. The silent treatment that Richie had been getting lately was driving him insane. He and Eddie had always been the closest out of the friends; late night calls, movie nights, the barrens by themselves. Now it was as if they were strangers. 

“Look, I fucked up at the store,” Richie said, dropping Eddie’s hand. He picked at dirt that was under his fingernails. “I shouldn’t have kissed you and I’m sorry–“

“You didn’t kiss me.”

“Do you have amnesia or something? Yes, I did and I’m sorry if –“

“No,” Eddie interrupted him again. “I kissed you.”

Richie paused, then nodded. “So you don’t have amnesia.”

Eddie opened his mouth, his face unreadable, before shutting it tight and walking ahead again. The sound of trainers hitting concrete echoed through the empty streets. 

“I don’t want to talk about this,” Eddie said, barely above a whisper. Richie felt like kicking over a bin. 

He ran, again, to catch up with Eddie, his voice strained in frustration. “Why not?” 

“Just because, Richie!” Eddie yelled over his shoulder. “Why do you insist on talking about it?”

“Because I’m in love with you!”

Eddie stopped dead in his tracks. Richie’s voice bounced off the sleeping houses and disappeared into the night. No one was around the confirm what had just been said, but Richie knew and Eddie knew and there was no turning back. 

Eddie edged himself around slowly, his face a perfect portrait of fear; Richie wanted nothing more than to never see that look again. 

He stepped forward, “I’m in love with you.”

Eddie shook his head, his breath catching in his throat. “No, you’re not.”

“Yes, I am,” Richie took another step forward, this time grabbing Eddie’s wrists again. He held them like a life line. “I’m in love with you, Eddie Kaspbrak. I have been for ten years.

“I’m in love with your smile, your face, your jokes, your stupid hypochondriac ass,” Richie’s voice, for once in his life, was quiet. “Your mom.”

Eddie let out a shaky laugh. He looked down at their hands and then back at Richie’s face. “I thought you hated me.” 

Richie recoiled, hurt bursting through his chest. “Why did you think that?”

“Because I kissed you,” Eddie said sheepishly. “I knew you liked boys but I shouldn’t have done it and it–“

“Eddie,” Richie let go of one of Eddie’s hands and cupped his cheek instead. “Kiss me.”

All sense and logic left Eddie’s brain in an instant, and before he knew it, he was leaning towards Richie for the second time, eyes closed and lips parted. 

Richie, high on emotions, deepened the kiss. His hands moved to Eddie’s hips and Eddie’s own moved to his hair, tangling themselves in the heap of curl on his head. Richie had never felt softer lips in his entire life. 

Richie pushed into Eddie, causing him to stumble backwards into a letterbox. Eddie hissed into Richie’s mouth, but the pain was soon forgotten as lips attached themselves to his neck. 

“R-Richie,” Eddie gasped, burying his head in Richie’s curls. Richie planted a kiss under his ear. “I don’t have work in the morning.”

Richie pulled back, a smile spread across his swollen lips. “I know, dipshit.”

When Richie and Eddie turn up at the Barrens the next day, Richie buzzing with happiness and Eddie with hickeys blooming across his neck, the remaining losers share a knowing look but no words. 

Bev takes twenty dollars off Stan, Mike rolls his eyes fondly, Bill punches Ben to get him to look. 

Richie kisses Eddie on the cheek.

**Author's Note:**

> hope yall enjoyed!!
> 
> comments and kudos mean the world to me!!
> 
> find me on twitter @eddieskspbrak


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